Jun 02 2016



I went to the theater with low expectations because of early reviews. Still, I reserved my judgement because I just can’t get into premature Nerd Hate. Okay, let me start with the good stuff first because word on the streets is this latest film is trash.

Oscar Isaac did a decent job as Apocalypse, but with some good writing, he could have brought it to another level. Fassbender kills once again in his more personal scenes. And the one and only part I was looking forward to was seeing Quicksilver do his thing again, and I was not disappointed in the least. Now for the bad stuff, and there was plenty. Maybe not enough to rate the film less than 5 out of 10 like Tomato critics are giving it, but enough to make me rant for a bit. The story was too elementary and the writing could have been much better. I have to ask a question – Why would you let the writer of the most hated X-Men film ever even touch the script of Apocalypse? Kinberg wrote Last Stand and his X-Men days should have been over after that. The second thing to mention was the special effects. Some were good, like Arch Angel’s wings or Quicksilver saving people, but other effects were atrocious. I know this story was set in the 80s, but that didn’t mean they had to make the green screen effects look like they were from the 80s too.
Many of you blerds out there wanted to know if Storm was decent. Yes, and no. Ororo, the pickpocketing girl in
Cairo was decent. Shipp played the young rainmaker with a mischievousness from Storm’s early days in the
comics. But once she became the Storm that we know, the acting was dialed down to smirky grins and a whole lot of hand waving to make lightning bolts. The same happened to Olivia Munn as Psylocke. I don’t think she had 3 sentences to say in the whole film. And that was the problem, no one in the film stood out and made you connect with them except Evan Peters as Quicksilver. and maybe Nightcrawler (Kodi Smit-McPhee) because he got some laughs. And then there was Apocalypse himself.
This was not the Apocalypse I knew from the comics. No transforming hands into weapons. No growing huge, though they did throw in a cheat scene. This was just another example of a superhero franchise featuring a villain that they didn’t do justice to. Truthfully, Apocalypse was just a fashion and hairstylist student trapped in a bad guy’s 5000 year old body. If you see the film, you will know what I mean. I don’t want to complain about the one other thing that didn’t work because I would be spoiling it. Let’s just say they needed to wait and let the story and new characters build in the franchise before revealing this and that. But even with all those bad aspects to the film,
I still think non-nerd critics are giving it too low a score. Geek Soul Brother gives X-MEN: APOCALYPSE 3..25 OUT OF 5 COSMIC AFROS.

About the author

Geek Soul Brother

Puttin' the Funk in the Final Frontier! A Christian time-travelin' brother from the 70s. Loves Scifi, Fantasy, Horror.

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